Thoughts in a Hotel Bathroom.... the Day that My World Changed.

Well if you haven't already guessed or figured out

  I AM PREGNANT! 

Crazy right!?

It has taken me months to even want to blog this but I feel like I should.

I am due January and if you count back that does mean that i was already expecting when i got married but NO that isn't the reason that Brad and I got married! 

I  found out that i was expecting in a hotel bathroom on our honeymoon which let me tell you was the scariest moment in my life other that having to tell everyone after finding out. 

I remember sitting on the toilet and just staring at the test and not wanting to go out and tell Brad because I didn't want him to be upset or overwhelmed or disappointed, 

I remember saying a silent prayer to Heavenly Father and asking him to give me strength and courage

I also remember asking him to assist me in being the best mother I could be.

 I remember walking out of the bathroom and looking at Brad and tried to make a small smile and saying "well we are going to be parents"

I remember the fear I felt as I told him after-all we had JUST got married! 

And then I remember the look that Brad gave me it was if not only had I changed everything but I also had made him the happiest man in the world. 

I remember looking in his eyes and being able to know that everything was going to be ok and that this baby wasn't going to be a burden on him but rather a blessing! 

I will never forget that look as long as I live and man I thought that the look he gave me when i walked down the aisle was the best look but it wasn't!

I remember thinking that no matter what this baby was going to change our lives for the better. I knew that this baby came at the right time and that Heavenly Father wouldn't have chosen me to be their mother if he didn't think I qualified. I then decided that i was going to put my faith in him and just follow Him.

I remember a little bit of the rest of the honeymoon but not much, I do know that we had fun but i also kept thinking how that was going to change our lives so much and how were we going to be able to survive on our already stretched income and how were we going to be able to have a baby.

 I remember calling my best friend and telling her that I was pregnant and scared and that I didn't know what I needed to do next and Bless her Heart she told me to call and get an appointment. 

I honestly don't think that i would have kept sane with out that woman! Thank you Best Friend You know who you are!!
I remember going to the Doctor a few days after that and being sick to my stomach when i had to answer ALL the questions they asked. I remember that when they asked me to give blood I just hate that part!
THEN....I heard the heartbeat and saw the baby!!!! And everything that had been FEAR turned into LOVE! 

I know that this baby IS supposed to be coming to me to be the best mother I can be!

I know without a doubt that my Heavenly Father has given me the best blessing that he could ever bestow upon me! 

I know that this baby might not have come in the time that I had planned but in Heavenly Fathers timing!

I am so excited to be able to receive this special calling of being a MOTHER!